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The Art Of Civility

morgan leigh photography                                 (photo credit : Morgan Leigh Photography)

Politeness is universal. It is the first rule of civility for mankind.

Being polite is one of the great assets a person can have. Society dictates high regards for people with impeccable manners and good behaviors.

But time and again, this proves to be an exception rather than a rule. Because a person’s race, religion, skin color, economic status or education is not a determining factor of politeness or good behavior .

If one is willing enough, It can be learned and improved.

We live in a world where interaction with fellow human being is inevitable. Even our own family have given us our first lessons on proper behavior – how to fight fair and resolve our conflicts with our parents and siblings. Marriages crumble to pieces when trouble and hatred consume the relationship through the years.

Good relations are part of a humanity’s success. But each individual has different needs, wants and ideas. And so despite the friendships, camaraderie and goodwill amongst us, sometimes these simple interactions turn into strong disagreement between people.

This kind of power struggle is our own way of protecting our beliefs and identity. We stick to our guns. Being right is always our main goal. But being right is not always the same as being happy. It creates tension, disharmony and sadness.

There is a middle way. Compromise.

One lesson I learned in life is that – one can disagree without being disagreeable.

I cannot have my way all the time. There is a more gentle way of communicating without being antagonistic and defensive about it. This is where civility will come in handy.

Just because you disagree with someone doesn’t make them wrong. Or vice-versa .  Our  strong feelings and erratic emotions should be controlled and set aside to give way to a better understanding with people.

We have to respect each other’s individuality.

Because this is what mature people do.

We hear out each other’s thoughts and ideas. We weigh the pros and cons and come up with conclusion that works, not only for the people involved but also for the good of mankind.

Civility is one sure way of preserving our integrity.

We stand firmly behind our ideals but respect the opinion of others  – without malice.

It is the truest test of a person’s maturity.

It is also Propriety. Gentility. Courtesy. Kindness. Respect. Consideration.

Thus, it is an ART. Embrace it.